Will rehab really help me?

Question by sweetheart: Will rehab really help me?
Got hooked on hard drugs when I was fifteen, mainly heroin. Of course, it was to help deal with a combination of an unhappy childhood and miserable high school days.

Long story short, I ended up becoming pregnant after I was raped by a guy who had been supplying me with cheap heroin. I told the cops, but they didn’t do a damn thing to him because somehow they thought I was infatuated with him or some retarded ass shit like that. Sure, he was attractive, but that notion was far from true. God, I despise cops.

I was pretty horrified when I discovered I was pregnant. Pregnant by a lifeless street scum. Of course, I had no choice but to tell my parents, and they gave me the worst verbal abuse session ever. I was prepared for that, but what I wasn’t prepared for was being called a worthless whore by both of them God knows how many times. Despite everything with them, they had never said anything so hateful to me.

I never even thought once about having abortion. Even though I was atheist, I still thought it was wrong to kill a completely helpless creature.

I knew my heroin addiction would get the better of me if I didn’t get someone to help me stop it, so I admitted myself to a mental health care facility while I was pregnant. During that time I grew to really love my unborn child, despite the events that had led to its conception.

It was torture going for so many months without a single shot, but it was more than worth it, because I was blessed with a beautiful and healthy daughter.

I left the facility after she was born. My family refused to help me out with her upbringing, so I had to borrow money from the government and move out and try and make a life for the two of us.

I stayed home and looked after her for the first few months, which meant half a year of missed school, not counting the time I spent in the hospital because I’d still been able to do my school work there. Eventually I absolutely had to go back because I could afford to miss any more, otherwise I’d been living off welfare for the rest of my life.

My daughter is two years old now, and I’m eighteen. I managed to finish high school and get accepted into university. Her father is constantly in and out of prison so he can’t provide any financial support, even though a paternity test proved that he really is her biological. I am basically living in welfare housing working a minimum wage job, because I go to school, so I have hardly any money, which is something that my ongoing heroin addiction is obviously not helping with.

Heroin has been controlling my life for so long. I’ve been it’s prisoner for three years and despite my academic success, it has been destroying my life in many ways, and I want to get back in control and be free again. Not for myself, but for my daughter. I really do love her – I love her more than anything in the world. I want to be a whole person again, because my daughter deserves to have a whole mother, and I want her life to be so much better, so much happier than mine ever was.

After a lot of phone calls and discussions with my counselor, I’ve agreed to do a strict three month long program at a mental health/drug rehab facility at the hospital. While I’m there I won’t be allowed to have any contact whatsoever with the outside world, except for a phone call to family once a week, which I doubt I will be using. It’s probably going to suck, but I really do hope it will be worth it in the end. I’m determined to get my life back in order once and for all and graduate from uni.

I was really reluctant, but I pretty much had no choice but to ask my brother (who lives about forty minutes away across the city) to look after my daughter. I felt guilty about doing it, because he is twenty seven and has two small children of his own to look after, plus three months is a long time to be looking after someone else’s child, and I don’t even have any money to pay him for his help. He told me that it did not matter, that he was very pleased to know that I am going to get help, and that he will more than gladly care for my daughter while I’m gone.

I was so happy that I almost cried. I’ll never be able thank him enough for being the only person in the world who loves and cares about me enough to do that. Who could ask more of a brother?

I really do hope that I can walk out of the rehab center as the real me again – the person that I was in a time that feels like it was a aeons ago, before I fell under the monster’s power – which I can hardly believe was only three short years ago.

I am going to try very hard and give it everything I have. But does anyone else have some knowledge or personal experiences about drug rehab? How effective is it in helping you defeat your addiction?

Best answer:

Answer by SuperVibrationalEscrow
Inpatient rehab is the only thing that I have ever seen anybody who isn’t willing to go down a spiritual path (I don’t mean religion) for a cure. I have seen rehab work for some people. I have seen meditation and seeking spiritual enlightenment work for some people. So if you give it a chance, then when you get the toxins out of your system you have a good shot. You can’t live in the past though or you will be sucked right back in and relapse. You have to learn to face whatever happened, and whatever you did..and say that was then, and this is now.. and choose to live in the now.

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