why do my friends feel like burdens on me?
Question by Nicole Smith: why do my friends feel like burdens on me?
I am 19 and recently had a baby,I don’t have much time to hang with my friends, I have two best friends, and they come to me a lot with there problems. I have no problem at all listening and giving my advise. One of my friends who is also my age has a kid and does drugs now. Not weed but like meth. And my other friend keeps getting pregnant and having abortions. She had two in the past like 2 months. I care about them both alot ,as if they are my sisters but,I’m scared that my friend that is doing drug is a bad influence and I don’t want to have a person that may be on drugs around my baby. And my other friend is just really disappointing me,and I feel she’s not the person I thought she was should I cut them both of because I feel like there problems are becoming mine and its stressful to c people u love hurting themselves. At the same time I feel like its wrong to not stick by them.
Best answer:
Answer by Average 15 year boy
I’m no expert but perhaps these websites may help.
http://www.wikihow.com/Help-a-Drug-Addict
http://drugabuse.com/library/how-to-help-a-drug-addict/
Summary from websites:Stage an intervention and be ready as friendly support by suggesting drug rehabilitation programs and keep your friend busy by being there for them.(Calling,hanging out,playing sports,simply letting them know there is someone who cares and enjoys her company and most definitely would stay by their side no matter what).
About “interventions” directly from the website.Bracketed lines are main points):
“(Hiring an intervention specialist) can make things easier. An intervention specialist helps you set up an intervention for your loved one. He or she (coaches family and friends on what to say during the intervention process). It’s important that you (emphasize how much you love the person) and emphasize (that you will give your support during recovery). At the end of the intervention, the drug user is (asked to enroll into a treatment program right away).”
“Drug abusers (tend to get angry) easily, so you need to (approach the situation with care).”
“While an intervention will likely be overwhelming to the addict, the (intent is not to put the addict on the defensive), and you should (carefully select intervention participants).”
“Participants should prepare specific examples of how their loved one’s drug abuse has hurt them. Often, those staging an intervention choose to (write letters) to the addict. An addict may not care about self-destructive behaviors, but (seeing the pain drug abuse inflicts on others) can be a (powerful motivator for seeking help)”
Websites also state to (expect relapses).
I shouldn’t need to advice to be careful about who influences your baby.
About your other friend,why doesn’t she use condoms or contraceptive pills?In any case,no offense intended.
http://voices.yahoo.com/sex-addiction-8-ways-help-client-sex-11611030.html
If they do not recover or help better themselves in any way,maybe it’s time to put family first.
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