I need advice from parents with SEVERE behavior problems in their children?
Question by KATY: I need advice from parents with SEVERE behavior problems in their children?
I have a 14 year old son who has all his life had emotional problems. he doesn’t have a life of “abuse”, just something in his genetic makeup.. literally..that made the switch for good and bad behavior not work. His diagnosis is severe and is currently in a court ordered treatment facility for his behavior. The VERY brief details are..lighting fire on school bus. vandalism to school property. sexual assault. assault. urinating on peers and their beds at the facility he is in now. damaging property. suicide attempts. homicidal tendencies. weapon contiband and theft. assaulting staff. self mutilation. and the list goes on for miles. I have been told that he has the making of a serial killer and his therapist is having a very hard time dealing with him. I respect his therapist. A wonderful and patient person. We have had no phone contact besides therapy every 3 weeks becasue he gets privaleges taken away. I need suggestions from parents with kids like this. How do I get threw to him?
How do I make him see that this is not appropriate behavior? I have literally read the books, done the therapy, talked to him, loved him, yelled, cried. Nothing works. He has no conscienous. He can Hit me in the face and laugh. He can kill things and feel nothing afterward. I won’t let him go to friends becasue I am afraid of what he will do. He can’t do any sports because he is to violent. He wants to sleep, starves himself to a mere 78 pounds just to get attention. And bottom line.. He admits it’s for the attention. He’s a VERY smart kid. he gets PLENTY of posative attention when he deserves it. I correct or ignore the bad tantrums. Grounding does not work. Spanking.. HA! He fights back now. I feel like I am at a loss and in my heart afraid for him to come home. He is serving a MINIMUM of a year there. If you are a parent of therapist who can offer advice.. real advice or techniques. I would REALLY appreciate it. I refuse to give up on him.
I do pray. I was working with the youth group at church until his behavior got so bad he got put on house arrest and I couldn’t even take him there. He is on meds. Lots. We were seperated from each other for a long time and that is a contributing factor to part of his diagnosis, but as far as ACTUAL abuse. no. He lies and says he was, but when you get down to fact, he lives in his own word and I can’t believe anything he says without having the facts in front of me. We are a Christian family and it’s hard for me to hear my son say he has a black heart, Gave up on God, and draw the nastiest pictures that I won’t even describe. But again, he did them to get my attention and get a reaction. When I stopped reacting the way he wanted me to, therapy wasn’t working ( he’s very sweet and manipulative to everyone) he took things to the most drastic of places. He is in one of the countrys best facilitys. I couldn’t have asked for me. But I know there are other parents out there who have advice.
Best answer:
Answer by *Salsa*
Im sorry to hear the problems you are going thru and trying to help him….
depending on where you live, this program sounds like is what he needs….perhaps you could call them and ask for advice.
http://www.menninger.edu/p-adolescent/description.htm
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