I am abusive to my friend’s dog. Do I have a problem? Am I a psychopath? What should I do?
Question by Kyle L: I am abusive to my friend’s dog. Do I have a problem? Am I a psychopath? What should I do?
Here’s a story:
My friend owns a Teacup Yorkie. Google it, but Cloud (the name of the dog) is rattier, with longer hair. I never used to “abuse” him. In fact, I always felt bad when my friend would punish him when he did bad stuff (nothing insane, just some smacking).
My friend got another dog 2 months ago named Mocha. I’m not sure what the breed was, but she was small, but still like 3 or 4 times the size of Cloud (lap-sized, basically). I’m not sure if Mocha (and I doubt) Mocha was the reason I started abusing Cloud, but there is definitely a chronological link. Mocha abused Cloud a lot. It was always the same basic pattern: Cloud and Mocha would be by each other, and Mocha would remember that she loved to bug Cloud. She would start with darting in and nipping Cloud’s ears, and each dart was more aggressive than the last. After a while, she would be tackling Cloud, nipping his ears, and walking away to let him back up, and then repeating it.
I thought the behavior was pretty amusing, but I would cut it off when she got too aggressive with Cloud. Soon, my friend can’t stand Mocha, and I got her. I loved Mocha a lot and never hurt her, and I was sad to have to give her back, but I couldn’t keep her. I felt bad having to leave her at home alone in a closed off area (not like a closed room, but a gated living room) each day when I left, plus I have to go out of the country for 4 weeks soon, and I just didn’t want to deal with the hassle of that stuff. So I give her back like a month ago, and now she is off at my friend’s cousin’s place.
So back to the question. Recently, like maybe 2 weeks ago but I’m not sure, I’ve been super mean to Cloud. Every time I see him, I have to catch him. When I get him in my hands, I just get that rush of adrenaline like when you’re about to fight or something. I also get super frustrated, and I target Cloud with it. Whenever I can chance it, I do something abusive. I don’t squeeze him much, but I flip him around or shake him or whatever I feel like doing, like rushing my fist or palm towards Cloud and not hitting him so he flinches. I also like flicking him moderately hard in the face or body, or sometimes when I flip him upside-down and place him in the crevasse of my sitting thighs, I’ll flick him in the nuts. Cloud simply makes me want to abuse him. Like, I should be locked up or something, because I feel like I will kill him, like that’s how it will/should end up.
I realize that it’s sick, and wrong. I can’t help it though, he just gives me that rush. I’ve never abused a dog before, and I still don’t–Cloud is the only dog I abuse, and I love all other dogs and have never even entertained an abusive idea before. I’m very active physically and sports-wise and have a regular social life, so I don’t understand this need for violence. I’ve never had any mental health problems , although as of a few years ago, my father is in jail for life. But I’m not sure that has anything to do with it, because I’ve never had any sign of a weird problem with it, and I even went to a psychologist as a safety measure when it first happened, and he said I was fine.
Questions, comments, concerns? My question is up-top.
I didn’t wet the bed after… not sure on the exact age, but definitely not after 6, and a long time before that. I also never really played with fire that much. I mean, a normal amount I think.
Best answer:
Answer by cake
everybody has a little crazyness,but if youre worried thatthis is turning into something bigger then get help. I mean people abuse people,and its is just seen as a mental problem,not like psychopath,so whats the difference youre still hurting. Maybe you just have the feeling to defend somthing,by hurting whats causing the pain. its a cycle. kind of normal. like if someone is messing with your child you want to defend him and hurt the person thats messing with your child. maybe you just feel bad for this defendless dog.
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