how to handle my fiance’s crack addiction.?

Question by tryingtohelp: how to handle my fiance’s crack addiction.?
When I first got with my fiance he had been clean for 3 years. We have currently been together for 2 years, and a year of that he has been relapsing into his drug addiction. 90% of the time, he is the man of my dreams, very sweet caring, generous, compassionate you name it. Nobody would ever know, including my family that he is an addict. I want to marry this man, I love him with all of my heart but this addiction is hurting us both. He had a very rough childhood, and he as always had a vice. He was drinking, smoking pot as a teenager, and heavier drugs leading up to crack as an adult. Now thats all he uses.Just recently he completed a 3 day impatient program, and started going to meetings. After one family argument, he did not go to two meetings and starting using again. Yesterday was his worst binge ever and he spend the rent money. I usally hide car keys, cash, and debit cards everynight from him. Now, it will be paid, i wont be homeless but I am in total shock. He wanted to go to a 28 day program, but he would need to switch his insurance, to one that will pay for the program, but not really anything else. He would be screwed insurance wise. I am so confused. I am very hurt right now not knowing how to deal with this, how I can get him help, and how I can live with him without enabling? He spent the rent but I still need to pay it.
I am not going to leave him. He fights this addiction every day. The illness does not make him a bad person. He and I both want him to get better. Turning your back on the ones you love is not the answer.
Do not tell me to leave him. He is not physically or mentally abusive in any way. I just need to “put up” OUR money if he gets the urge to use. You would not leave a family member if they were sick. He is PERFECT 28 days of the month.

Best answer:

Answer by Ken
leave the loser

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