how do i leave my common law husband after 21 years?

Question by figaro’s mom: how do i leave my common law husband after 21 years?
emotional abuse, infidelity, substance and alcoholism. we bring out the worst in each other. i am a recovering alcoholic with my first year truly living sober in one month. i had the support of counselling and out patient rehabilitation therapy. for the first time in my life, i have seen all kinds of life’s scenarios with a different perspective. unfortunately, i have realized that the relationship i am in fit well with being an alcoholic and a co-dependent person because we both had the right toxic cocktail approach to a relationship. i thought everything was my fault, end of story and have since realized there is so much more beneath the surface. i am still so scared to be on my own even if it means that i will grow. i am one year away from being 50. i still feel unlovable and disgusting, even though intellectually i know that is my disease talking to me. sometimes i still wish i could just “end it all” but realize that as another escape mechanism, like booze. he’s a drug user too, but he insists that pot is good for you. i dont agree. i feel so confused and sad.

Best answer:

Answer by Xexx M
Hardest part is walking out the door. It gets easier from there.

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