Family stress and year 12! Please help?
Question by IMOGEN: Family stress and year 12! Please help?
I’m 16 and my last exam is on November 18 this year. My family has always been dysfunctional but I am finding it is getting WORSE and I just can’t deal when this is my final year: IB exams, SATs, CAS, running and babysitting.
All they do is fight, he was never meant to be let back into the house after the AVO lapsed, she is an alcoholic and he drinks too much sometimes too, but it just seems NOBODY will get help for their problems! I ask him about her issues during the day when he is sober – and she is not (she drinks as early as 6am sometimes) and he just says we can’t do anything about it. It’s getting to the point where my door has cracks all in it from slamming it innumerable times every day. My workload is insane and I just get so stressed from all the crap at home.
Her alcoholism makes her like a toddler. She just contradicts herself every second sentence, pisses everyone off, screams, shouts abuse and says the most hurtful shit to me. So my question is, what the hell can I do??? I can’t talk to her, she’s always drunk. My father tries to sweep everything under the carpet and plays mind games with me. How can I reduce my stress? I run every night to try and take stress away but in the house, I spend at least an hour a night arguing and it usually ends in tears – this is valuable study time being wasted! Also, please don’t tell me to just avoid conflict – people actually barge into my room shouting at me. 13 years of this crap makes for an angry person.
thanks guys 🙂 that’s actually really helpful, I do stay at the library when I have an afternoon with no sport or tutoring, but I guess just keep ignoring it. Like one answerer said, even if I did help them, what’s the point at this stage? And there would only be so much I could do. Thanks again!
No, I have no-one here in Australia besides my immediate family. Ah thankyou so much for the help, just gotta stick it out until November 🙂
Best answer:
Answer by Nathan
I think you are being incredibly brave and admirable at handling all of this. And i know its so frustrating everytime someone asks you to avoid conflict. because if it’s that easy, won’t you be doing that instead of asking?! I suggest concentrating on your studies now because its your only ticket to your way out. You won’t be able to help them by fighting with them and it will only create further tension and anger with all of you. Maybe you should take to studying in the library or at a friend’s place? I know it sounds selfish, but if they are not willing to help themselves, don’t screw up your life trying to help them and get emotionally injured for it too. Good luck and i hope things go smoothly for you.. =/
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