Child that doesn’t seem to understand consequences for disobedience.

Question by pixelmation2002: Child that doesn’t seem to understand consequences for disobedience.
Ok, there is a longer version but for now I will post the short version and interject more when I get back and have more time.

We just took in my stepson that is 10 by birth but 6-7 socially. He can be a very sweet child but also likes to do what he wants, when he wants even if told he was not to do whatever it is over and over again.

Today he decided he wanted to play with something that he knows he is not allowed to play with, and because he has been told before and we think he has been mis-dxed with adhd, instead of punishing him and being mad I asked him why he did it.

Bottom line, he knew he wasn’t suppose to mess with the item, much less with anything in my office area, yet took it anyways because he wanted to play with them, even though he understood he was not suppose to.

I asked if he thought he would get away with it (no one would find out), get in trouble for it but didn’t care or if he thought he just would not get punished for it. He chose the very latter…why?

Just a quick low-down:

Unwanted pregnancy, mother was on meth, she got an infection so he was born early at 6 months, was in hospital care for a month, then grandma took him home and raised him.

From what I have gathered, he has been on sugar all his life starting with sugar water. Grandma would let him have a whole cup of sugar on his cereal. No disipline for the most part, grandma is “socially retarded” for lack of a better word (I love her dearly, don’t get me wrong), let him always get his way then told the Dr she could no longer handle him when he was 4 and they put him on ritalin.

Today I had him drink coffee because I don’t think he has adhd and it made him hyper, just like the adhd drugs do. He talks to someone that talks back to him and all we can get out of him is that it is god (I did not capitalize as I am not sure who he is really talking to).

The mother’s other son that is older than my step son has a plethra of behavior problems and then some, yet she swears there is no “mental illness” in her family…weird, 2 boys both the exact same way by same mom, I don’t think so! I have 3 kids and they are each different, 1 being from the same dad my step son is from.

So, that is the short version…you may email me via my profile if you have questions or post them here and I will add more…THANKS!

Denise 🙂
To the first two responses – THANK YOU – for the great laugh!! We have done both (even the “abortion” by removing him from the home once before). He lived with us for 1 year but due to violence had to be removed from the home. We have him back only because his grandma is too sick from stress from him, so we had no choice. BUT, we also had more kids in the home at that time that are no longer in the home, so I have more one on one with him now.

I know that he does not have add nor adhd as he can concentrate with little help, he just knows how to play the system and is very, very manipulative!

I have wondered about PDD or some sort of personality disorder. I pray for him and his “whatever” everyday and I am also very patient.

I would love to beat him as I do my own kids, even before they do anything bad I will give them some “love” swats, as I call them. They love it though it hurts a bit, the sting of the hand 🙂

All his current Dr wants to do is medicate him 🙁
Plus, I just spoke with my ex who got a chance to be around him for a whole day, along with 3 other boys ranging in ages from 10 – 15.

He said that he is definitely VERY manipulative and that he now sees where the other boys are coming from (one of them lived with us during his previous violent episodes)!

He stated that he nagged and called them names just because they were busy doing other stuff and wouldn’t do what he wanted them to do…even after being told no by myself several times that he could not go on a bike ride (that was just one thing).

He said it was like an impish child throwing a temper but quietly so the adults couldn’t hear him. We have sometimes wondered if he really did always start stuff or if the other boys did.

Now I know who is the manipulative instigator and name caller. Then he called the other boys “pussies” and my oldest told him he had a big mouth for someone who couldn’t back it up!

He is delusional & grandoise (ms?) about himself.

Best answer:

Answer by JonnyMnemonic
wow.. -splashes holy water on your kid- the power of christ compels you!

ok that wasn’t helpful. but consider this… is it too late to have an abortion?

no wait that wasn’t helpful either

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