bridging the generation gap
bridging the generation gap
The communication gap between successive generations can be traced back to world history. As early as the time of the reigns of Marie Antoinette of France and czar Nicholas of Russia, was this phenomenon prevalent. There reigns were brought to an end because they failed to live up to the expectations of the following generations
In recent times the queen of England was also criticized when she failed to express remorse at her daughter in law’s death. The stiff upper lip attitude later had to give way to a befitting eulogy to the princess, much to the relief of the younger generation.
Every country is entangled in a similar problem between parents and children of the family. With this fast lifestyle, parents and children hardly find time together. The children thus unable to express their thoughts and ides to their parents turn to friends for advice, who are as inexperienced as them.
The youth all through the ages have remained rebellious and vivacious. They are always bubbling with excitement and forever in a quest for attaining name fame and affluence. Looking from the point of view of the child, right from infancy they enter into a competitive world where there is a competition for every thing. From speaking the first word to who walks first… everything… they are put through the rigidities of life when they are required to attempt for admission into nursery school. Later they have to outdo their classmates in academics and other activities. Many a time the true potential of the child is overshadowed in this rat race. Parents then influence the children in choosing subjects and careers.
Pressurized under the decision of pursuing a career of their parents choice, the children are often left very confused, lost and in most cases dejected. The parents’ restrictions on movement with friends, late night parties, pubs and discos all add insult to injury. In an attempt to sever all umbilical ties with their parents and break free, they unknowingly fall prey drug addiction, substance abuse or end up as total nervous wrecks.
Parents on the other hand feel that in this rapidly changing society where everyone is so self centered, it is their duty to safe guard their children from going astray. In order to safe guard them from the hypocritical world they are, from childhood taught only the “good things” in life. Every facet of his life is explained in terms of those 2 syllables, good and bad. Almost all the things a child does in his life 90 percent of it is considered bad and the child hardly gets to know what is right and good about him. As the child grows his expenses get severely monitored and the parents insistence on a chronological update of their activities leaves them to feel very bare and rebellious.
Parents tend to feel that their child requires guidance in his growing years. It is not to be denied. But the fact that, excessive guidance becomes interference in the individual’s life is somewhat ignored.
Family is the basic unit of the society. Cracks in the family would expose the cracks in the society. It is very essential for parents to talk to their children and treat them as individuals. To be forever treated as a child is very infuriating in deed. The children in turn must reciprocate with due respect and attention. Matters such as career, lifestyle and sensitive issues like sex and choice of friends must be dealt carefully and with maturity. It must not be thrust on the child but talked about with valid reasons and examples.
The best way to deal with problems is by bilateral talks and negotiations. Love and understanding are the best antidotes to growing family discords. Love and trust are very essential. Only then will children look up to their parents and parents will not be burdened with the guilty feeling of not being by the side of their ward during the hour of need. In this way the generation gap can at least be narrowed if not completely resolved.
Ritu Naiya