Angry, sad, hurt. whats wrong with my emotions?

Question by Broken: Angry, sad, hurt. whats wrong with my emotions?
Okay, so ive been feeling quite low lately, infact i’ve always been hurt, sad and lonely for most of my life, just in descise. My mum gives me alot of verbal abuse “you sl*g” “you b*tch” “watch what i tell people what you are!” and she does… most of her friends hate me, and she wonders why. People often misunderstand me, iam just a normal 15 year old teenage girl, aware that i don’t know everything about life, and wanting to make the most of my young years. But yeah i feel like somtimes she loves me, then she hates me and no its not normal, because its worse when you see the situation. I just dont know what to do with her, she’s munipulating me every day and iam so bad with arguments… so i just let her. Today i was at my dads house in London which is miles away from her house, so i couldnt live with him because i need my school, education, gcse’s etc. But anyway i was here, today, and she came to drop my disabled brother off, i went downstairs “hey mom:)” “hi.” she started shouting at me, saying i only stay here for the “men”. Just to inform you, i have never even had a boyfriend, nor kissed a boy, infact, i reject them all the time because my mum tells me too. It hurts, the stuff she says, iam always having a panic attack because of it and stuff.. iam not a bad person i swear, i try my best to please people but as i said, i get misunderstood. My family are very munipulative, favouritism…you could say. But yeah i have never fit in here, in my family. Half of my family i dont even know properly, theyre racist and the other half well they dont like the fact iam half of another race. Iam half Italian btw. Basically i dont belong in the family, iam too forward with people, they are two faced, do i belong here? no. School-wise, i love learning and am quite smart which iam suprised at that my brain hasnt overloaded with all the sh*t going on. iam quite popular because iam “beauts” which i dont agree with but everyone says so so… thanks everyone?… so i look normal… but inside iam crazy, crazy thoughts noone will understand, i just feel lonely, want somone i can talk to… but i feel like thats impossible, this is not even half the problems iam having, but i wanted to give you a brief idea.

Please dont say “counseling” “its just a phase <----- b*tch please, its not a phase, its a forever thing! please understand what iam saying and understand i have so much more to say, and so much more sadness to explain, but i cant because iam one lazy m*otherfxcker. So everyone hate's me in my eyes, if not they dont care. I have tried and tried but i guess what goes around doesnt always make their way back. Iam so kind to everyone and dont understand why iam so invisible, people even think iam some big headed pretty b*tch... iam not i swear... 🙁 Best answer:

Answer by Lauren
You’re right you are not a bad person, I think your mom might have some kind of mental problem for treating you like that! If i were you I would tell her how you feel or just leave and hang out with your other friends.

Savannah and Brandon Dance 7-12 – Video by Charity Olson.