From a loser to a winner? Did my friend save me? (long but plz I am confused and angry)?

Question by Parsa K: From a loser to a winner? Did my friend save me? (long but plz I am confused and angry)?
I am 17 and most girls I know, know me as a “sweet, good, nice guy”. My best friend is what you call a “bad ***”. we are both good at sports and guy stuff, . but I tend to care a lot more for girls. I have to admit that in a “movie” sense, I would be the “sweetheart” and he would be the “bad boy”. I listen to a girl and give support, and try my best to make them feel like the only girl in the room. He wouldn’t do anything like that. He gets more “attention” though. I want some love too. The first girl I ever like is a close friend ,but I don’t know what she thinks about me . I think she is perfect for me, every girl I see has “dimmed down” in looks since I started to like her and I really like her personality. She isn’t “popular” and has the same friends I do. She wrote in my b-day card, ” I can’t believe someone like me ever met someone like you”. According to my friend, That’s just a trick for me to be a cushion to the girl and that she will use me and never look at me the way I want her to. I trust my friend because he has always been “successful” with girls (something I always envied. I always thought he was “the man”, and I was the loser). I was the straightedge, funny, at best “ok looking” , bad dancer, caring guy with good grades and he was the good-looking, party animal, good dancer, drinking, doing drugs , treating girls badly, and failing class. We are the closest friends imaginable as we always helped each other since we were 4. I always envied him, as he received affection and love from girls that I only wish for. I went to my friend for help. He grinned and promised to help me out with the girl . He said girls only like “badasses” and that I have to become one or risk dying alone. I always wanted a a meaningful relationship with a girlfriend, and always hated how he always gets the girl 🙁 ” You are a loser now , not a “badass” like me, if you want to be a winner, you need to do everything I say”. His idea was that girls only like nice guys when they have had their fun with 50 “badasses”, are used up, no longer young, and want to “use” the nice guy for finance purposes only, not love. ” You don’t want that do you? You actually want to be somebody right? Start listening”. He changed me and promised that I would be finally looked at by a girl. I lost 60 pounds, got a 4pak (working on six), learn how to fight, do drugs and alcohol and teach me HIS etiquette with girls (treating them terribly). We stayed up til 3 am working out and doing exercises where he taught me his etiquette. The girls I used to be friends with missed the “old me”. My friend said that they “missed using you, none of them would actually like the ‘sweetheart’ you, the way you want. No one does”. I bought it; He is never wrong . Girls I never knew started to like me. I felt bad for losing my morals and my identity, but I finally had some actual affection. Will doing all this stuff be better for me than being the “good” guy I was ? I always felt like the “idiot , who can’t get a girl” compared to my friend and I don’t want to be that “sweetheart ” my friend says will have a girl, only 15 years later and be a “financial scratchpost” to her and not as someone she loves.
I have never had confidence in who I was. It seemed like no girl likes me, I started think myself “unworthy”.The girl who made the card, I told her she is beautiful (my way of giving a hint) and she was shocked(she said her parents didn’t even think that). I helped her out when she was down just because that’s what i usually do, but I started to like her more than others. I really really like her. I gave her compliments because she also has low -self esteem.My friend made it seem like “I am not good enough for a girl,” so i started to say that every morning when i got up. My friend showed me the “old me” was never going to be loved. The girl I like never saw the “bad***” me because I wasn’t ready to show her. Don’t give cliches that aren’t true,and don’t say “Get confidence” because I tried the positive thoughts, working out etc and it did not work. No way for me to love myself. I can’t fake it. Please what Do I do? When I am a “sweetheart” to girls, I always thought badly of myself

Best answer:

Answer by ☮✿♡
I’m sorry, but I would prefer the old you better then the new you. That “friend” of yours is a BAD INFLUENCE. You shouldn’t drink or do drugs or anything, that won’t make you seem “badass”, that’ll make you do poorly in school, and overall effect your future. A girl will never TRULY love you just because you change your appearance. Sure, you can keep working out and stuff, but don’t change anything else. stop the drugs, the alcohol, and don’t lean onto your badass friend for advice. hes just a party animal and has no thought for his future (which could possibly be in a box on the side of the road if he keeps what hes doing up.)
Sorry for the long answer, but overall, i agree with your TRUE FRIENDS. Don’t change who you are just to get girls to like you, someone will come along and like you for the person you are inside.

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