How can I stop crying when I see my father?

Question by Jeliza Rose: How can I stop crying when I see my father?
Alright here is the problem.. please read carefully-

My father was never there for me and I feel like we’re both miles apart. I don’t think he knows how much the pain effected me when he walked out on my mother, and then years later, started a new family. I feel guitly, and not good enough.. I mean, he got married 2 years after he walked out on me, my brother and my mother and even had 3 kids with this women. [Whom he met when he was selling meth]. I don’t know if drugs played apart of my parents divorce or not but I do know that he was always there for me and my brother financially but not physically.. he never bought me or my brother a Christmas present or even a birthday card.

I know that worst things happen to people who do not deserve it.. I was only 2 when he walked out but I remember it like it was yesterday. The movie plays over and over in my head all the time.

He’s got 5 kids.. I’m the only girl, so I guess that girls are more emotional but it does bother me alot.. and I think I need counseling, but I cannot afford counseling.

I work at a grocery store. My father recently visited me at my job, and obvisously had a new girlfriend on his arm.. this girl was ugly.. all he said was “Hi.” I just stared at him like he was stupid.. he bought her a rose, and chocolates. HE BOUGHT HER A ROSE AND CHOCOLATES BUT HE NEVER BOUGHT ME OR MY BROTHER ANYTHING.. ANYTHING IN MY LIFE. I hope that skank gets fat.

Yeah, I admitt.. it does bother me.. it bothers me alot.. all of his girlfriends are junkies, and are on drugs.. I’m a decent person. I’m not like them. I work. I drive a nice car and live with my boyfriend. But when is enough, really enough? I think the only woman good enough for him was my mother, but his brain is on drugs and he can’t function like a normal person can.

Do you think he realizes how much this is hurting me.. do you think he even cares?

How can I learn to deal with the probablems he caused? Like, everytime I see him or hear him, I just want to cry.. he never cared about anyone but hisself.. Although he knows me and my boyfriends house number, he never calls.. he only called once asking for $ 100.. but he’ll never get any money from me or my boyfriend. I don’t care what he wanted to spend that on.. drugs or not.. he’s not getting a penny from us as he does not deserve it. I don’t know what to do.

I just want to move on from my past, and move on my father.. but how can I do that? I tryed keeping a journal.. but that doesn’t help any. I talk to my boyfriend [soon to be fiance] about my troubles and horrors with my father, but he’s always tired because of his job and doesn’t feel like talking about it with me. I talked with my mother, but she just tells me to “let it go.”

How can I move on? Please help.

Thank you.

Have a nice day.

Best answer:

Answer by Greenstar
My friend’s parents were worse than that but he always said people told him to let it go…and he said it didn’t work that way. So don’t think you can just let it go and forget it instantly. It’ll take a long time for you to get over it, but I doubt you’ll get over it completely. Just remember that God has a plan for you…and nothing is out of his control. Hope I helped! =)

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