I’m beginning to hate myself. How do I become a better person?

Published January 19, 2011

Question by Danielle: I’m beginning to hate myself. How do I become a better person?
I’m 31, married with a 2 year old. I have a good job and went to college. But, for the last portion of my life (around 10 years), i’ve done nothing but destroy my body and my mind through drugs and alcohol. I fought a cocaine addiction thankfully, but I still have my marijuana addiction and my addiction to going to the bar every single night, even when I don’t have the money. I smoke pot every single day and when I don’t have it, I feel aloof with everything. I drink everyday about four drinks.

I’m just tired. Tired of living this life. I feel like a failure to my daughter. I hate myself that I’m not the mother she should have and I’m so embarrassed at myself.

I don’t know what to do that will make me REALLY change instead of saying it but going back to the same old thing.

I prayed this morning and cried about it and I asked God for help. I haven’t really been into God lately and I wonder if that’s what is going on.

I just need help and direction. I would love to hear from people who have battled with these demons like me. Thank you.

Best answer:

Answer by Orla C
God helps those who help themselves. Phone the AA and ask for help, that’s a good start.

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