Please help me! Can you make sure I’m not being too strict?
Question by Matt Johnston: Please help me! Can you make sure I’m not being too strict?
My wife is having twins, and we hope to have one more shortly after. Here is how I generally plan to raise my kids. i’m sorry it is long but I just want my kids to be successful and smart like me, but I heard if you’re too strict they can be corrupt. Please read and tell me if I’m being too strict. I’ve sorted it by age:
Infancy (Newborn to 1 year): Play classical music when they sleep, I heard it makes them smarter. enforce walking and talking, children who speak earlier are more likely to be smarter. (I spoke at 8 months) SLeep whenever possible.
Toddler hood (2 years to 4 years): Play with them, punish them if they do something bad. Explain the importance of school. Take him to museums and art galleries, regale them about tales of history and science. Sleep whenever possible.
Childhood (5 years to 9 years): Enforce age appropriate clothing. If they curse, they will be punished for two weeks: punishment is You get home from school, do hw, and then study and go to sleep, no friends or computer or TV privileges. The same if they backtalk to me and my wife. If they do not get A’s and Bs on schoolwork, they will receive a scolding, and possibly a 3 day punishment. If they are hanging out with bad people I will talk to them about it, and I feel they can resist the temptation, I will allow them to hang out with these people, however if they can’t stop their relationship will end. A cavity means lack of hygiene and will receive a 1 day suspension and the humility of me checking their teeth after brushing (And don’t say that’s not possible, I’m 27 and I have never had cavities, my mother is 48 and has never had cavities). Bedtime: 8:00 in early childhood, 9:00 in late childhood)
Pre adolescence (10-12): Age appropriate clothing. I will smell them when they arrive home from school or parties, if I smell drugs, cigarette, or alcohol, they will be grounded for 3 months: school, hw, and sleep. No bad kids. If they do not get A’s or B’s in school, they will be scolded and possibly punished for three days. Backtalk is unacceptable and will result in a two week punishment, cursing will result in a one week punishment. I will explain to them about sex at this age. However, if they mention they are having sex I will observe them whenever I can’t, and I will not allow them to have sex until after marriage or if they really love their boyfriend/girlfriend. A cavity means lack of hygiene and will receive a 1 day suspension and the humility of me checking their teeth after brushing. Bedtime: 10:00
Adolescence (13 – 17): Age appropriate clothing. They must get straight A’s; B’s are no longer acceptable. If they do not get straight A’s they will receive a scolding, a 1 week punishment, and no more allowance until they prove themselves responsible. If they go a single year without a single A they will be punished and their computer/TV will be taken out of their room. At 13 I may let you steer into the house by sitting on my lap prior to that, but no driving yourself fully until 15. Then, once you get your license only drive during dawn, daylight, and dusk, no night driving. If you are going to a party, I will drive you there and back. I will smell you, if I catch whiffs of cigarette, drugs, or alcohol, you will be grounded for five months: You will come home, do hw, and go to bed, no parties, nothing, and your car will be taken away. Also, they will be taken to a rehabilitation program. If you get a ticket, I will take away your car. If you exceed the speed limit and I catch you, grounded for a week. No texting unless an emergency. You can take phone calls but on a bluetooth. That is my plan to keep my kids safe and responsible. Backtalk will receive in a three week punishment. Cursing or swearing will receive a 1 day punishment. A cavity means lack of hygiene and will receive a 1 day suspension and the humility of me checking their teeth after brushing. If they are caught having sex they are no longer allowed to date until 18.
Tell me if I’m being to strict, being too strict can corrupt kids and I don’t want to do them. Keep in mind I will still love them and play with them, and give them freedom and let them drink small sips with ONLY me at around age 16, however no drinking outside without me unless 21+
I was only including the negatives. Of course I will praise them, what I was talking about was how I will punish them or act with their mistakes. Also, if they get grounded for going to a party where people are smoking, it’ll teach them to leave whn others start smoking/drinking too, but yeah 5 months is too much, maybe just 3 months.
Thank you, i wanted to make sure I wasn’t too strict 😉
Actually Willow, that’s exactly what I wanted to hear. Thank you for being honest, now I know I am too strict. help me find a way to change a little?
Best answer:
Answer by Noodles
okay smelling them is too much no Waaay, 10 is too late for a 10-12 year old, when i was like 14 going to school that was my curfew, i think, you shud let them do extra curricular, like piano, or dancing or judo :s i did, its a great way to meet people out of school, nbot only for children but for parents too the punishment for not geting all A’s ish harsh you should praisse them as much as possible not punish,all i see here are punishments where are the rewards?? OMG what if people are drinking and smoking at a party, obviously there gna smell of it, 5 month punishment is harsh, thats almost half a year too strict, they might just rebel, what would you do them and at 17 i’ve never had a filling but you cant actually blame them for needing a filling, that stuff just happenes
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