In a relationship with a pill addict- please help…?

Question by NERA: In a relationship with a pill addict- please help…?
My boyfriend of 2 years is addicted to oxycodone. He is legally prescribed them by disgusting pill-mills in FL for an old injury, which is no longer in need of pain managment. He is fully aware of his addiction, but only when he runs out of his pills. We we first began dating, I was unaware of his pill addiction. It was only 5 months later I found them hidden, and by that time, I was too happy and in love to just leave. He is the most amazing, kind, wonderful person I have ever met, and we both knew early on that we were “meant for eachother”. Before I learned of the addiction, and after, he became my best friend, the one I go to for advice, and then one that usually listens to mine. We are close with eachothers family, honest, and happy with eachother. These things do not make an excuse for his addiction, but rather explain why I am so lost. I could not imagine my life without him, and leaving him is not an option. I have been fighting with him since the day I found out about the pills, but he only lies and finds ways to manipulate and convince me that things are getting better. At first I thought and believed him that he could fight the addiction himself, but I learned every few months that his stories about cutting back to what he is actually perscribed (6 a day) was a lie, and he has still been doing 8 to 10 a day. I am not in denial, and not oblivious. I see now after 2 years that the pills are having an effect on his body, mind, and spirit. I have been begging and pleading for 1 year and 1/2 now that he needs to go to an in-patient rehab. I no longer loan him money or help him in any way get to his appointment. Sometimes it’s hard with these pills because unlike drugs like alocohl or meth, he is “normal” when he is taking the pills, and is different and horrible when he runs out of them. It is only when he runs out that reality sets in that he has a real problem. Everytime he thinks I am going to leave him, he makes up a story about quitting. He cuts back and becomes a different person, and I have to take care of him, cater to him, and worry about him. But everytime this has happened, it has been pointless because he is usually lying or pretending to be cutting back, or does is only for a few days. Therefore, everytime he tries to “quit”, I usually have an emotional breakdown because I can’t take his word for it and be there for him, when I doubt what he tells me. The paranaoi sets in. Part of me feels responsible that I have let it go on for this long. Should I tell his parents? He’s 26 years old and can’t afford in-patient rehab on his own. Part of me is scared that if I tell anyone, that his entire life will change and he’ll blame me for feeling shame and embarassment from his friends and family (he has told me this). Part of me also thinks that you can’t make anyone go to rehab, they have to want to go themselves. But I can’t let his life, body, and spirit fall apart. He is such a wonderful person, full of such kindness and innocence. He loves the outdoors and nature, and has taken care of me and supported me in ways I never thought any man would. But it has gotten to a point where he can’t take care of my anymore, and I find myself taking care of him. I would take care of him until the day he died, but letting an addiction like this continue is not taking care of someone. I am lost, alone, and going crazy. I find myself alientated from my friends and family because I am so lost in all of this. I love him so much, and I truely don’t know what to do. Please help if you have been in this situation, or can offer sound advise.

Best answer:

Answer by erol
Have you tried hard to find a pill addict as a friend ? And why do you have to solve his problems.
The best thing for an addict to do is to leaving him alone and making him to see the hell that he is going if he continues to shoot pills.
And in addictions returning back and recovery possibility is 10 percent.

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