do liars and sex addicts ever reform?
Question by Sally: do liars and sex addicts ever reform?
my husband is a sex addict and a liar. details are at:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Asm1vZZuV2B2STpxoh9JAmXty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20080928090226AAESdYX
he lies about everything, no just the addiction. a month back, i found porn sites visited in his web history and saw he was indiscriminately viewing porn from everywhere – from work, from public places. he told me before marriage that he was not into porn, and i had told him i had zero tolerance for porn. also, he said he was not into fetishes, but i found disgusting kinds of fetishes he viewed.
do such people ever reform? he claims he is seeing a certified sex addiction therapist for the addiction, joined the local chapter of sex addicts anonymous, got a sponsor, and i sent him to a psychologist to “cure” his lying. he got some books/workbook by patrick carnes (sex addiction expert) and claims he is going through the 12 steps of sex addiction recovery.
i feel these are just damage-control mechanisms to soothe/placate me. i don’t feel he is really remorseful. he is doing it so that i think he is doing something about it, not because he feels it is wrong.
does anyone know any sex addicts or liars that have really become better human beings? if you have any experience with such people, please let me know. i am trying to collect statistics to see if there are any chances of recovery or am i just wasting time waiting for him to change?
Best answer:
Answer by Magic 8 Ball: The Witch is In
Give him a little time. Even if he is just going through the motions right now, it is likely that with a structure of support, he will realize the damage that he has done to your relationship and ultimately to himself. One of the 12 steps is apology, so wait until he gets there and give him some time. He is doing more than most guys would.
Give your answer to this question below!