HELP My Boyfriends on METH?
HELP me my boyyfriends on METH?
My boyfriend has admitted to using meth before, he doesnt seem to do it all the time maybe once a month? everything will be fine between us and one day he will disappear for days without calling or answering my texts or calls, I am reading up on meth and I would like to know if this is common for a meth user to disconnect himself like that. he has kids also, I am worried he will lose his job, i knew he used to do it alot more when he was a teenager but he is 34 now…and the more i am around him the more i get this feeling it might be a problem… his car is home but no one is at his place, where is he at? who is he with? is he alive? these things are going thru my head. I would never suspect him of cheating either but is this a likely behavior if a person is on meth? I have had gut feelings about cheating and I honestly dont feel this in my heart, but am i just being naive here? help me i dont know what to do. i feel like he may be drowning and i do not know how to stop someone I love from drowning himself. He admits when he uses sometimes but blows it off like its no big deal. i dont think he thinks he has a problem, but not contacting me for days not going to work or seein his kids, I SEE THIS AS A PROBLEM…please give me your thoughts
***well in continuation to my story i went to his place last nite it looked like no one was there…i sat in his lobby and just texted him I AM HERE INFRONT OF YOUR DOOR AND I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY…he FINALLY RESPONDS if u really are there please GO i would NEVER LET U SEE ME LIKE THIS…im so sorry. you were right all along i need help i do have a problem…WELL ME BEING THE ME I AM, i swear i was like a negotiator i said please let me in its cold out here, if your there bring me a blanket….anything i wanted him to let me in. i needed to see him. i finally could see the tv light from under the door crack and knew he was there i heard him take a shower, he finally let me in, i have never been more saddened in my life. to see his condition. he told me this wasnt him this wasnt who he is and i said BUT IT IS! i didnt discuss he and i or IT because i knew he wasnt in the right state of mind. he even said he wasnt. he looked like he hadnt eatin in days. or slept. i remember all the symptoms and feelings from when i was a teenager…he was coming down im sure…i looked at his window where hed places 2 blankets over it possible to block out the noise of traffic from the street. He told me he loves me so much that he didnt want me to see him this way, I KNOW NOW HE HASNT GONE TO WORK and will probably lose his job, i am suprised he let me in. I AM IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO IS SLOWLY Killing himself. i dont think i can just let him go and do that. I need to know from someone who has been under this drugs control if there is anything i can do to help him, he did say he needs help and he is sorry that i was right all along, but he was in no STATE OF MIND LAST NITE for us to discuss anything other than that. its like he wanted to run fromme he didnt want me to judge him and i wasnt i was there because i was worried and because i care what happens to him. please give me your thoughts if there is something i can do, if he wants the help. i am in no WAY A NEGATIVE person to him, i have always been the one to save his day but this thing is bigger job and i feel broken hearted and completely helpless
i feel like he has an addiction to drugs and i have an addiction to him.
Tags: Teenager, Texts, Continuation, Heart, Gut Feelings
3 Responses to “HELP My Boyfriends on METH?”
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find a new boyfriend as he will not change until he is in jail or dying.
I feel very badly for you right now. You are caught between a wall and rock…… Basically, even if you love love love love him, and he love love love love’s you, that is not to say he can or even will easily kick this habit. Meth/crack/cocaine etc. are all deadly drugs…. why? because they alter your mind, how you think, how you feel, how you act, what your goals are, who you love etc. All of a sudden, those bills that were top priority, they become LAST priority because he needs his fix. Work that was at one point the ideal job he could want, becomes a figment of his imagination and he could care less if he went bankrupt or went on welfare. His children are still the love of his life, but their needs will come after his fix if they are met at all. You will be put in a position where fighting and battling and hurt becomes the CENTRE of your relationship with him. Your fighting for him to stop because you’re on the outside looking in, he is fighting to come down and is stressed and upset with himself subconsciously and because he is depressed will most likely fall back to drugs because it is a quick fix in clouding the problems in his life. I fell the only way to help someone like this is A-get them to willingly get themselves checked into rehab, or B-threaten to report his children to child services because he is an unfit father, hoping this MIGHT make him change C- leave him, and notify family/friends/law enforcements of his behaviour and get protection for his kids
Other then that you can’t do ANYTHING….. he is a grown adult and is choosing this self distructing path. I hope the best for YOU that you can be strong enough to pull through this, and understand, sometimes people need to lose something before they realize they need to shape up and fix things.
good luck
I was in that same situation for a long time. It’s very heartbreaking, I know. I was with my ex for about a year and a half and his drug problems brought me down just as low as he was. Eventually, I ended up on drugs myself. He didn’t have a drug of choice, he was just addicted to getting high and soon I was the same. Both of us ended up using needles.. cocaine, meth, pain pills, heroine, we smoked crack, you name it we did it. I lost my family, my friends, my job, my house, my car… everything. All because I loved him and tried to help him get clean. I tried cocaine with him the first time just because I wanted to understand what was so great about it and why it was so important to him. It happens fast, a lot faster than you would think. And you don’t even realize how far down you’ve gone until you hit rock bottom. Finally I had to leave him to get clean. It broke my heart but I had to do it for myself. I had to move to another state with a friend ( now my husband) to get clean. He sat on me for months, taking care of me when I was sick from withdrawal, and I got off the stuff. But what you have to realize is that if he isn’t ready to quit he won’t. You can’t force someone to want to get clean and they won’t do it for you or anyone else. He won’t get clean for anyone but himself. You stay in a relationship with someone that you love because it makes you happy, right? Are you really happy? As much as it hurts, you may just have to break it off. I know that’s not what you want to hear, and I know it hurts like hell. But it hurts just as much being with him. It may sound selfish, but would you rather see one life go down the tubes or two? The second one being yours. Please think about it and remember to put yourself first because no one else is going to. Right now, that dope is all he cares about. I’ve been clean and happy 5 years now, and I wouldn’t be if I had stayed with him. I’d probably be dead or in prison. Please please please put yourself first.